Winds of Time
by Azul Bloom
Summary: Wendy's death kindled his deepest dispair and the greatest adventure of his existance. PW[Eventually R-rating]Excuse my cyber pencil shavings while I revise.


**Winds of Time**

by

Azul Bloom

**Author's Note: **Fully revised. Based on the 2003 movie as well as the novel. Same details apply: This will seem like two stories in one, because I _wanted _(scratch that..._tried_)to write something very canon but still very much Peter/Wendy (a la 2003 movie) This first chapter sets the tone for how I'm_ attempting_ to mesh the movie, novel and a present day story line together. If it sucks…sue me. (Total assets accumulate to less than $23, so jokes on you).

**Summary: **The Darling children return home after their grand adventure with Peter Pan, but life will never be the same for anyone, especially the eternal boy. After finding himself completely alone, he finally realizes that love in deed, passed him by. With a new hope for another meeting, Peter embarks on the greatest adventure of his existence, and a chance to gain everything he had been too afraid to know.

**Chapter 1: Always and Forever**

There was wild chatter and excitement audible in the little nursery. Mr. Darling had taken out paper and pen, and set out to draw up rough figures of their expenses adding on five more mouths to feed and minds to school, but he quickly abandoned that task when Mrs. Darling gave him the gentlest stare of discouragement. Instead, he threw the paper and pen to the side and listened as Michael and Nibs re-laid the fabulously extravagant tale that was their final battle aboard the Jolly Roger. Wendy herself, was neck deep in giggles and bursts of laughter as her brothers fought each other to tell of their stories.

It had been but moments before, when Peter stood by her as he steered the pirate ship through the high skies above London, and the boy hadn't had the courage to say what he felt. He would be lonely, without Wendy.

"Peter." Wendy broke the silence as the thick clouds that blanketed the grounds that where London became visible from their place high amongst the stars. "You are not to stay with us, are you?"

His face was grave and his movements where temperate. He turned the helm to guide the ship towards the west, making their trip just the tiniest bit longer. "No."

Wendy grew sadder. "Why, Peter? If I may ask."

His eyes still gazing over their path, he licked his lips, once and twice. "I have _my _home."

Wendy nodded gently, and turned her face away to look over the edge of the ship.

"You have a home too, right?" Peter said.

Wendy turned to him again. "Yes."

"With a mother who keeps the window open."

"Yes." She sighed. "Hopefully."

"And a father who won't try to run you through for not taking your medicine."

Wendy smiled lightly, scoffing at the image of her father brandishing a sword against them. "Yes."

Peter said nothing more and focused his sights on the path ahead, trying very hard to remain silent about it all.

"Where will you live?" Wendy asked. "The underground home is no longer safe. The pirates know of its location."

"In the tree tops." He turned the helm a little more, causing the ship to glide farther out of course. "Tink will gather some of the fairies, and they will lift the little house high up and out of sight. That is to be my new dwelling."

"But, won't it be awfully lonesome?"

"Tink will be there." He replied.

True enough, Wendy thought, Tink would never leave his side, but how much comfort could she be? She couldn't even stretch her arms one tenth of the way around him. When he'd cry out in his sleep, distraught from a night tremor, would little Tinkerbell be able to take him in her arms and soothe the dream away? Would she be able to lull him to sleep with songs and stories? Would she mend his clothes and cook his supper? Wipe his face when a smear of dirt from a fun tumble tainted his cheeks? Hold his hand as they fly through the Fairy Grove on those warm Neverland evenings, when the twinkle of the happy stars are outshined only by the golden glitter of the fairies?

"You could return with me." He said, turning to gaze at her. "After your mother sees you are well. You could come back with me." A tiny glimmer of a smile fiddled at the corner of his lips.

Wendy grinned brightly, ready to accept his invitation, but alas, she was a practical one and she knew that she could never just stay in Neverland. "I can't" she said with a droop of her head, truly sorry that she had to decline his offer.

He shrugged his shoulders and brushed it off as if her rejection hadn't cut him as deeply as it had. "Very well then." And just to make it more convincing and perhaps a little more enticing, he added, "Oh, the fun we will have, just Tink and I."

Wendy grinned. "I suppose you will."

"No silly parents to tell us when to go to bed, when to bathe or send us to a stuffy classroom." He said with a merry tune.

"I suppose."

"While you are in the arms of your mother, I will be in the arms of the wind itself. When you are sleeping in your bed, you could have been flying about with me, saying funny things to the stars." He said, partly to tempt her, and partly to reassure himself of his choice.

"I am sure."

"It's truly awfully bad that you won't get to enjoy it as well."

"It truly is." He would've had her fooled, if only his gaze hadn't betrayed him. He wouldn't turn to look at her throughout his bragging and Wendy knew exactly why. He was so good a pretend, probably the best in all the living world, but he couldn't pretend as well with her.

The ship descended beneath the thick clouds, so that Peter could see where exactly his destination was, and the inclination startled the boys from their slumbers inside the captain's quarters. Wendy held on to the railing which was just in front of them, and Peter couldn't help but turn to look at her then. There was a nagging wound somewhere inside him. Something that kept growing bigger, the closer they got to the Darling home.

Just as they came around the giant clock tower, Wendy thought it best to go and wake the boys and so she left Peter's side to do so. Tinkerbell, who'd been sitting in a lantern that hung on a hook from the wall behind them, came out and sat on Peter's shoulder, jingling to his ear.

"Glum?" he scoffed. "I don't look glum"

She asked him how he could possibly know how he looked, if he couldn't see himself, which stumped him for a moment. Usually, he wasn't one to keep quite and therefore admit defeat, so when he didn't reply with a quirky comeback, Tink knew that it really was upsetting him that Wendy and the boys where leaving. She poked his cheek with her finger and blew raspberries in his face, which only rewarded her with a slanted smile.

Inside Hook's quarters, Wendy approached the master bed and nudged the boys fully awake. She told them they were but minutes away from home which made them jump out of bed with a happy step and fiddle through the room to locate their things.

"It will be great to have a real mother!" Nibs said.

"Oh but it's not to say that you aren't a great one yourself, Wendy!" Slightly quickly added.

"Thank you." She smiled placidly, stooping down to Michael's eye level and ran her fingers through his disheveled hair. "I did my best, for I learned from the best! You will love mother and I just know mother will love you!"

Tootles' shoulders dropt as he placed the strap over his head and down to his torso. "And a father." He turned to look at the rest of the soon-to-be-no-longer-lost boys. "We trade in a pretend father, for a real one."

Silence consumed the room. "Do you think Peter will miss us at all?" a twin asked the other.

"I doubt it." Nibs replied. "There's been plenty more before us, I'm sure, and yet he never mentions them at all. It's as if, they seize to have even ever been."

Wendy tried to straighten out Michael's nighty as the boys simmered into noisy chatter. Curly asked if Mr. Darling was a pirate or an Indian, and John replied neither, which sparked even more questions about their parents. To John's surprise, he found that at first, if he squinted his eyes, he could see a fuzzy image of his mother and father, but with every meter traveled in the ship, the image became sharper and clearer. He was glad to know, that he in deed remembered his parents. Wendy turned to the door, stopping just before it to remind the boys to be quick, but when her fingers reached the knob; her heart did the funniest thing. It skipped a beat and formed a heavy pain in her chest, for it was trying to make her see what Nibs had unwittingly laid out nicely for her to know.

First kiss, first love. That was what Peter Pan would forever be to her. Even as time went on and she'd grow old, while he'd forever remain the eternal boy, he'd always own her hidden kiss. But what was she to him? A mother to his play? A girl he danced with in a warm summer night? Even if she truly meant more to him right now, for how long would that last? Would she become, just a whispered dream in the back of his mind. Perhaps one day he'd stumble upon her thimble, and look simply puzzled, wondering what it was and from where it came. Perhaps a fairy would absently ask about the Wendy bird had been seen flying about the island at one point, and others would stop and say they think they remember a creature of the sort, but none would recall a clear image at all. Peter would become a complete little boy again, aloof and gay, not a care in the world, for anyone; not even her.

Truly, she had been foolish to even entertain the notion that Peter Pan, the eternally child, would forever remember her. It was only right, for him to forget. It was fitting for him to do so.

Just minutes later, they reached number 14, and Peter lowered the ship to the cobblestone streets to allow the lost boys to get off. According to Wendy, it would be best if they were to come knocking on the door for a proper introduction. The ship then drifted up to the nursery window, and all three Darling children smiled wide when they saw their window remained unbarred but Peter only managed a shallow grin. Michael hopped on John's back ready to make the slender jump from the edge of the ship's plank to the window, while Wendy and Peter took a few minutes to simply gaze at each other. She smiled calmly and he raised his chin, puffing his chest and looking ever so brave.

"Thank you, Peter." Wendy said, taking one step towards him. "For everything and all, but mostly, for helping me know where I am to go."

She made to grace his cheek, but Peter quickly bowed to her, so she did the same, retracting her hand and instead, waved goodbye with a gentle flicker of her fingers and followed her brothers into their window.

Peter had longed to feel the warmth of her touch for just once one at least, but he felt his heart would leap out of his chest if she where to get so close again, so it was with mixed emotions that he dodged the embrace and allowed her to pull away and turn from him, off the plank and into her home.

And now, Peter watched from the shadows outside the window as his men were greeted with as much love and affection as Wendy and her brothers. He watched as Mrs. Darling dubbed each with the family name, embracing them as one of their own. And Wendy, oh Wendy. She was never as beautiful as when she smiled, and now, she was as beautiful as he thought any girl could ever be. How quickly, she seemed to turn her frowns and weeping eyes into joy and light, simply with a hug and a kiss from her mother and father.

It was as if, he was forgotten already. "To live," he told himself, "would be an awfully big adventure."

Tink was simply itching to return home, somewhat because she couldn't wait to have Peter all to herself again, and mostly to keep him from looking so somber. A few days of new adventures, a dozen cloud leaps and a pinch of mischief, and he'd be well again, she thought.

She tousled his tresses and pinched his cheeks, but he sniffled. He was on the verge of tears, Tink realized, so she made to poke fun at him and played the true to life smallest violin made entirely of pixie dust, which did stir a stifled smile on his face.

Tink was right, Peter thought. No use sticking around. Nothing left for him here now. He was forgotten already, so fast and so easily. By his men and his Wendy. In his thoughts, he said goodbye and all the little wordless things he would have said to her, if only he knew how.

Above the wild chatter of excitement of new additions to their family, and amongst her father's numbering of the nooks and crannies in which to fit all the new children, she heard a wisp of wind from outside her window, and the corner of her eyes caught sight of a boy's shadow leaping off the nursery floor. She rushed to her feet and dashed to the window, hoping to catch sight of him before he was gone for good, and sure enough, there he was, flying off into the night, just a boy and his fairy. She thought him gone when she stepped into her room and the ship immediately ascended into the clouds, making for a hurtful quick departure, but he lingered outside her window! He remained even after their goodbye. Perhaps, he always would.

"Peter!" she cried as she reached the window sill.

She was calling him out, he was sure she was. He turned around in mid air and looked back into her face, her eyes only on him. Maybe it was foolish to have turned around, and maybe it was for the worst that he did, but he didn't care for right now. He only hoped the mischievous tears that pushed to roll down his cheeks could be held at bay, at least until after he was gone.

"You won't forget me, will you?" she asked, with hope stitched in every word.

Peter smiled and scoffed. "Me?" he asked and crossed his arms. "Forget?" He smiled wider at her silly question. "Never."

Her hope turned to joy at his promise, and such joy could not be hidden from the smile on her face, and the bittersweet tears in her eyes. He loved that smile. He loved that face. It was true. He'd never be able to forget her. Not in a million years. But was that such a good thing? Could he live knowing of her, but never again knowing her? His smile faded and his eyes saddened.

'_No…never could I forget you, Wendy. Never.'_ What more was left to say? Oh, but to stay outside that window, forever in each other's sights. Forever young, and forever loved. Forever the one that owns that radiant spark in the azure of her eyes.

He slowly lifted his hand and waved a weak goodbye, turning about as slowly as he could, to make his last glimpse of her last. But as her eyes lost the sight of his, she quickly cried out again. "Will you come back?"

Peter seized his flight and turned to her again. Come back, she said? Was she asking for him to return to her again? Could he? Was it all right? Of course, he did need to return! He needed more stories. New and more exciting tales of adventure and peril, and who else could ever tell such tales as well as Wendy? "To hear stories...about me!"

She smiled wider at the arrogance of his reply. Always the cocky brave boy, and never would she want him to be otherwise. Finally, with one last truly happy smile, she allowed him to turn away and ascend into the starlit skies. She watched him as Tinkerbell circled him, creating a halo of gold around his form. As the snow began to fall, she watched as his figure grew smaller and smaller until all that was left of him, was a far blinking light, heading towards the brightest star of all.

'_Stories of you, Peter Pan?'_ She thought to herself as she remained by the window, even after the dark of night had consumed his golden glow._ 'Always, and forever.'_ She happily pried her eyes away from the skies and turned to rejoin her gleeful family in the warmth of the nursery. So big did her family seem, and so many more would they have to make room for now. There really couldn't be so many children in her home. She had to grow up to make room for everyone.

A light darkness cloaked the image of the happy family, and Wendy could hear a distant breeze that carried their promise throughout the starry night.

'_Always and forever, Wendy'_ His voice echoed, as it would do every lonely and blissful night, from that moment on.

'_Always and forever, Peter Pan' _Her own voice whispered back in the breeze, dancing their eternal promise amongst the falling autumn leaves, winter first snows, spring blossom scents and warm summer winds.

"Always and forever." She voiced the lingering whispers of her dream and her eyes fluttered open, the last syllable escaping the confines of the dream. A moment passed before the world formed around her and the sounds of the morning toiling became coherent in the distance.

She lay on her side, looking forward at the wall to the left of her bed, the giant poster print of Van Gogh's _Starry Night_ glossy with the morning's sun.

She looked to her alarm clock and huffed when she realized she had been robbed of 15 minutes of sleep again. She turned the alarm off with a heavy slap and sat up in bed, rubbing the lingered sleep from her eyes. A yawn escaped her lips and her eyes went wide when she remembered one very new item.

"Always and Forever", she repeated quietly and reached over, opened the drawer from her side table, and pulled out her notebook and pen. Concentrating on the few tidbits she could recall, she leafed through the pages and came upon the first blank sheet, and quickly pressed ink to paper and jotted down:

_January 9th  
_"_Always and Forever"(still don't know who says this…it might be me)  
__Flying ship  
__A stain glass window…very Victorian-esque…I think.  
__A dog…as a nana? (not sure about this)  
__The shadow again. (43rd time)_

Just as she reached out for whatever other little morsels she could find, they all scattered back into the dark corners of her psyche, simply teasing her from their sheltered state. Such nasty little things! Flying about in the drawers of her mind, chiming incoherently and tickling her senses every now and then, taunting her with a knowledge she knew just had to be of some importance. Fine! She thought, slamming her notebook closed and jumping out of bed. If the dream was to be stubborn again, she wouldn't pay any mind to it today. But of course, she knew she only lied to herself, because there was always something in her day that reminded her of those shadowy things and hazy promises made, and that was, the golden haired boy with the eyes of emerald green, a twinkle of mischief in each and a smile that promised fun and laughter in even the gloomiest of days.


End file.
